Emily and Michael
Emily a doctor and Michael an engineer had no idea if they were ever going to last as couples for that long. ‘Every moment we were together it felt like we were drifting away from each other. I had no idea what to do but I knew something had to be done for this relationship to work. With two kids and a wife to take care of, the three gave me hope to keep fighting. I cannot forget a nasty incident, which happened some years back between my wife and my own family. My own family members one day decided to throw my wife and my two kids, Jenifer and Blake out of our house, while I was at work. It was the most trying moment of my life and I knew I had to be strong, calm and composed. Her crying over the phone almost broke me into pieces.’
‘When I confronted my family, the only valid reason according to them was that she was not good for me because she was from a different cultural background. Their reason was not good enough; you cannot wake up one morning and decide to hate someone because they are from another culture. If they could not accept my wife and my kids as their own then they had to forget all about me. I chose to stay with my wife and kids, a decision that I have never regretted ever making. Emily is a special and down to earth woman; she is the type of woman who believes in the voice of reasoning and not just jumping into issues. This is what attracted me in her the very first time I met her at the bus station on my way to work one fine day. Every day I made sure I passed the same place just to catch a glimpse of her beauty and offer her a ride to her workplace. One day I gathered courage and asked her out, she was reluctant but agreed after several tries, that is after one year. My wife is a Caucasian while I am from Germany. We have struggled together as couples to where we are. I love everything about her strength, courage, care and the fact that she never gave up on me when I had nothing. She is my light and shining armor.’
Cole and Travis
‘Saying that my relationship with my husband, Travis, and my in-laws has been a smooth one will be an understatement. We have faced good, bad, and worse moments trying to make things work. Good moments because my husband is so supportive and worse moments from my in-laws who never wanted to accept me as their daughter-in-law and made my life so unbearable. I met Travis while we were still in the university, and learnt that both of us were exchange students. I was from Italy while him from India. What attracted me to Travis was his focus, support, courage, charming looks, and smile. My biggest challenge was trying to get along with my in-laws who never liked me simply because I am from a different culture. No matter what I did to please them, nothing seemed to work out.’
‘One thing that I learnt is to be patient with each other and not to expect everything to happen over time. Take your time to learn your spouse language, culture and everything that you can about them. For instance, my family had no problem with me marrying a person from another culture. In fact, I am from a mixed race; my father is an Italian while my mother is an African American. My father was so supportive of my mother and never allowed culture to define what they had. For me, that was all enough. If they made it, I also believe my relationship with my partner will work also. As long as you have that one person who loves and believes in you then you will have enough strength and courage to keep you going despite what you might be facing.’
No one says that when you marry from the same or from a different cultural background that things are going to be easy. Sometimes it can be so tough to break through. What matters the most is the two of you building your relationship on love and neither on people nor culture. Culture is just a practice and some people will never be happy with your relationship.